Monday, July 18, 2011

Be A Blogging Superstar - The Three-Minute Secret!

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It is stunningly easy to be a superstar blogger, according to Steve Tobak, who writes The Corner Office blog for http://www.bnet.com/, in a recent article titled "Want To Be A Superstar Blogger? - 5 Easy Steps."

The article is written in a satirical tone, but it is actually filled with wisdom. A friend once said to me, "Douglas, no one ever lost money on selling the intelligence of the American Public short." He was damn right. While this saddens me, it is not a terminal dumbing down. In terms of formatting, it simply means re-titling more simplistically and provocatively...and then leading into the article you intended to write.

Although it still hurts me a bit to say it (especially since it didn't say it first), if you follow the guidelines set forth (sarcastically) by Tobak, you will build up a fast following, and a mountain of daily page views. I promise. The article follows:

"Tell me you wouldn’t click on a headline that read, The 15 Minute Work Week. Come on, sure you would. How about these:
  • Why Working is Bad For Your Career
  • Is Sarah Palin the Antichrist?
  • Is Facebook the New Matrix?
  • How Religion is Destroying Corporate America
These are the kind of outlandish headlines we’ve come to expect from a blogosphere that thrives on outrageous hype and contrarian sound-bites. You know who’s to blame, don’t you? You are. That’s right. Admit it. You know you crave this stuff. Everyone does.

Sure, I’m part of the problem too, but it’s not my fault. I used to have a real job but, one night, I fell asleep next to an alien pod and woke up this way. Not buying that? Okay, what really happened is, years ago, then CNET editor-at-large Michael Kanellos asked if I wanted to do a blog.

“What’s a blog?” I said.

Four years later; here we are. And you know what? It was easy. Best of all, anyone can become a famous blogger with gazillions of readers by following these 5 easy steps.

So, in honor of the guy who somehow got me to give up a fortune in consulting fees to blog for peanuts, here’s my take on one of the funniest posts I’ve ever read (here’s the original, but frankly, I think my adaptation is a big improvement):

How to Be a Superstar Blogger

1. Be insane or obvious, but not both.

“There are two basic reactions you’re shooting for. You either want to: one, stun someone into a temporary catatonic state with enigmatic predictions, or two, confirm their prejudices and personal beliefs.” In other words, it’s either Charlie Sheen Should Be CEO of Time Warner or Outrageous CEO Pay Still on the Rise.

“Being outlandish and predictable at the same time, though, is tough–unless you graduate to compound sentences.” Then you can say, How an MBA Will Destroy Your Career While Improving Your Self Esteem. On second thought, better stick to one or the other. The audience prefers its lunatics to have a consistent methodology.

2. Watch what’s trending on Google and Twitter.

Forget esoteric stuff like helping people boost their careers, land jobs, or run their businesses more effectively. Instead, focus on what’s hot and trendy: social media, personal branding, Generation Y, Apple, Facebook, and don’t forget Charlie Sheen.

Practice coming up with headlines like, Gen Y Personal Branding Gurus are Uberfull of Ubercrap. And yes, I really did write that one.

Kanellos - now editor-in-chief of the popular Greentech Media site - says the more esoteric and unlikely the concept, the more popular it is. Everyone’s bored to tears with global warming, climate change, or whatever those wacko environmentalists call it these days, but if you really want to get everyone’s attention, try, New Google Car Runs on Brainwaves: The Smarter You Are, the Faster it Goes.

3. Find a good enemy.

One name: Sarah Palin. Everyone loves to hate her. If that doesn’t work for you, I’ve got a whole laundry list of villains for you to go after: Big Pharma, Big Oil, CEOs, Corporate America, wealthy people (but only the business ones: entertainers, musicians, and athletes are all okay), George W. Bush, and if you live in San Francisco, of course, McDonald’s Happy Meals.

4. Never be afraid to one-up someone.

If another blogger writes, 10 Simple Tips to Make You Rich and Famous, you can easily top that with, The Secret to Becoming a Billionaire in the Next 45 Minutes. Try it; it works.

5. Be vague.

‘Winning’ With Social Media. Is Anthony Weiner a Hot Dog? How to Be Like Steve Jobs. Most Hated CEOs. Apple’s Next iThing. Top 10 Job Interview Tips. The vaguer you are while still hitting a hot, trending keyword or key phrase, the more clicks you’ll get. Guaranteed.

Finally, Kanellos’s coupe de grace: “As an added bonus, you might someday be right.” When that golden moment happens, be sure to put out a press release."

####

Yes, friends. The majority of people enjoy very light, quick-fix, pop-culture reading. Especially if the headline is catchy and sounds like a miracle cure. Instant gratification is the magic elixir for masterful bloggery (or "blogistry," if you're truly a master)

In these times of sensorial overload and societal ADHD, it is easier than ever to be a Superstar Blogger. Mind you, you'll probably never be known for the originality or quality of your content, but if you write one of these babies each week, advertisers will be lining up and puckering up.

As another friend (apparently I have another) once said to me, "Always pitch hard and low."

Lastly, as a third friend from the perfume industry (Who are these people? Can I really have THREE friends?) once said [with a French accent]: "Why go for class, when you can have mass?" Amen, Mon Ami.

On a serious note, adding a healthy dose of humor and a bit of your own personality to your writing will help you win some loyalty after the cheap "bait and switch" tactic of your post title has worn off and resentment sets in amongst those few exceptional people who were actually looking for substance, wisdom or serious advice. Make them

Faithfully,

Douglas E Castle
http://bloggingtipstricksandtools.blogspot.com/
http://braintenance.blogspot.com/



Monday, July 4, 2011

SEO Trends, Stickiness and Increasing Followers With Your Blog.

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The search engine optimized, sticky, content-rich, focused blog gathers the most followers. Here are the rules for building your "best-reach, longest potency" articles. Your visitors (both recurring and unique) and traffic will increase dramatically and rapidly if you simply don't tamper with the following proven formula.

Frequency:

You should write an entry at least once weekly.

Length:

The ideal length is generally between 3 to a maximum of 11 paragraphs; each of which should be short and punchy. Wherever possible, create simple lists, either bulletized or numbered. People love lists, rankings, trends, statistics and factoids.

Subject:

Be consistent in terms of the area or field you write about or focus upon. Build your reputation this way. Become known as a thought-leader or expert. Write with some passion, or don't write at all.

Title:

The title must be keyword stuffed within its first 120 characters.

First Paragraph:

The first paragraph should also be keyword-stuffed, but with a synopsis of why the article is important (its possible benefits) to the reader.

Closing:

Always use your full name or pseudonym {with a hyperlink to a site which contains your curriculum vitae or biography) and cite the name of your blog (hyperlinked to your blogsite address). If you write a smaller-fonted "p.s." section immediately beneath your signature closing, it will always be read. If you write your p.s. in a different font and/or color, you increase the likelihood of getting it great attention.

Your article is a sandwich -- from top to bottom it is:
  • Keyword-stuffed title;
  • Keyword-stuffed first paragraph with a synopsis of why the article id important;
  • Your content (which should be laced with in-text hyperlinked references);
  • Your closing;
  • Your p.s. message.
If you choose to add pictures, that's always acceptable, but they should not be overly large, and you should not have more than one image for every 3 to 5 paragraphs at maximum. Images should be centered, or set off to the left side of your posting field. Use unique and exciting images, wherever possible.

Do not use flashing images in your article -- they distract and disturb readers, and they also tend to draw the focus away from your content. Be certain that the important elements of your article (down to and including your closing) do not require scrolling on the part of your reader -- keep your best substance "above the fold" to the greatest extent possible. If your writing a long post, warn your readers (apologetically) about their having to scroll further.

As for additional tips, try these:

1) Put together your own list (in small font) of "Labels, Tags, Keywords, Categories and Search Terms" after your p.s., and hyperlink those all to your blog's url, or any other url which you wish to build in terms of traffic.

2) After your list of "Labels, Tags, Keywords...etc." list hyperlinked titles to several "related articles" by authors other than yourself if the reader chooses to go further with his or her investigation or study of your topic.

3) Be certain that your blog sends out an RSS feed (I use Feedburner), and that every new article is "pinged" to all of the relevant search engines. For this, I recommend that you Pinglerize -- that is, subscrible to the Pingler service immediately...go to (click on):
http://freetoolsforwebmastersandbloggers.wordpress.com/2011/06/15/ping-to-increase-your-seo-and-blog-traffic/.

Their service is unbelieveably cheap and the best in the marketplace - they have a package where they will automatically ping up to 50 blogs (yours!) as frequently as every three days to well in excess of 100 excellent search engines.

Faithfully,

Douglas E. Castle, from Blogging Tips, Tricks and Tools.

p.s You should visit our TNNWC website at http://www.TNNWC.com.  It's the 3.0 version and our programming staff and experts are delighted with the way it looks and its ease of navigation. I'm proud, myself.

Tags, Labels, Keywords, Categories and Search Terms For This Article: blogging tips, feedburner, pinglerize, Douglas E. Castle, TNNWC, blogging, pinging, RSS feeds, article structure, content, stickiness, blogging do's and don't's, Blogger, WordPress, Your Blog is a Sandwich, increasing traffic, increasing visits, increasing blog followers, content hyperlinking, communications, publicity, branding, Images By Douglas E Castle, The National Networker (TNNWC) Weekly Newsletter, efficient writing, clearer messaging, making your blog user-friendly.

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NOTICE: This article is Copyright © 2011 by author Douglas E Castle with all rights reserved. It may be republished without permission provided that it is published in full, with all hyperlinks and exhibits left intact, and with full attribution given the author. This article does not contain or constitute medical, health, psychological, legal, regulatory, investment, securities, financial, tax, or any other form of professional advice -- the reader acknowledges and accepts this disclaimer. Further, the reader indemnifies and holds harmless both the author and all publications in which this article appears of any damages, claims, loss, responsibility or liability emerging from the reader’s utilization of any information contained herein.


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Feedburner, CoolText Graphics, JavaScript Free Code, Zemanta, Google, WordPress, Widgetbox, and Wikipedia
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